Tempe • Mesa • Gilbert • Chandler • Queen Creek • East Valley

Family Therapy

1463151278When your home environment gets a bit murky…

How did you wind up here?

The family used to be this well-connected and tight knit group. You didn’t have many major issues over the years, but now you want to stay away. The conflict and the disconnect have you wanting to avoid any interaction or family gathering.

It’s not like you haven’t tried to say something. You have done your best to communicate how you feel and have asked for changes to be made. In the end, you feel ignored, dismissed, and disregarded. If anyone has a problem, it’s you – and you just need to “get over it.”

But you can’t “get over it!” This matters to you. In fact, it’s impacting your spouse and children, too. This is not okay.

All you want is peace. But you are beginning to doubt it will ever be possible. Perhaps this is the way it is. Families just grow apart over time. The thoughts of having a well-connected family are beginning to fade as a possibility.

On top of this, your kids are starting to change. You feel them slipping away and not sharing as much. The laughter and smiles have faded, and a quiet void has begun to form between you. You are concerned but not sure if it’s just part of the natural growth process or if something is actually wrong. Whatever it is, you don’t like it.

You want your kids back. You want your family back. You want to have conversations and share time, which feels connective and full of love.

1286290465Your family is the first group of people you count on.

We all start this life with a family, whether it’s composed of blood relatives, adopted parents, close neighbors, or a foster family.

That family influences every aspect of our lives. It’s where we learn our vocabulary, habits, customs, and rituals. It shapes how we view the world and who we become – for better and worse.

Families are intricate systems with unique histories and cultures. They influence us in subtle and not-so-subtle ways, guiding the choices we make (or don’t make) each day.

If we are born into a functional family with healthy relationships, we usually learn how to maintain similar relationships with others.

But if we’re born into a dysfunctional family that struggles to connect, we may struggle to connect to others as we mature.

While it is certainly unlucky to be born into the second kind of family, it’s not an unchangeable situation.

1905968905Family therapy takes a unique approach.

In family therapy or counseling, “family” doesn’t necessarily mean blood relatives or even those in your household.

Family counseling may involve the nuclear family (the married couple and children), stepfamily, or extended family members like siblings or grandparents. But it can also include anyone supportive, like a best friend or roommate.

Family therapy views members’ problems in the family context. It assumes that problems cannot be successfully addressed or solved without understanding the dynamics of the group.

Family therapy promotes the health and functioning of a family in a safe, controlled environment:

Addressing behavioral or emotional problems in children…

Bringing the family together after a crisis…

Creating honesty between family members…

Instilling trust in family members…

Developing a supportive family environment…

Reducing sources of tension and stress within the family…

Helping family members forgive each other…

Teaching members to resolve conflict peacefully…

… or bringing back a member who has been isolated.

292698278Here’s how it can help…

Understanding family patterns and dynamics…

Whether you see it or not, there is an order to things and how they work best. Whether from your family history or your survival techniques, you have adapted certain patterns and habits that may or may not serve you well. Gaining awareness can be a game changer and allow you to make choices best suited to your current dilemma.

By reordering the nature of your current patterns and interactional dynamics, we can begin to undo a lack of connection that leads to outbursts of emotion or, the opposite, shutting down and isolating.

Enhancing your communication…

You know communication is the key to any relationship, yet you can’t get it right. Often, we go in ready to share, maybe even to listen, but things go sideways very quickly.

Our time will focus on how to have these conversations in a constructive way that leads to connection, even during conflict, because you are talking about the subject matter that is most important and may not even be the topic being brought up in the current situations.

Establishing and maintaining healthy boundaries…

As families grow and develop, things must change. We often see issues here because they have not changed at all or have changed in destructive rather than constructive ways.

We discuss boundaries because they are the guidelines that allow us and those around us to know what is fair game and off-limits. When we have no boundaries, there is a free for all, and this can lead to unclear expectations and what is needed to maintain a healthy relationship with yourself and your family. Boundaries are ultimately not restricting but freeing, and we will work to create those that function well for you and your purposes.

Learning problem-solving skills…

Your life, as you know it, is perfectly designed to get the results you are getting. It’s like a math equation with certain variables that keep leading you to the same results, causing you pain and distress. Your problems may have simple solutions… simple but not always easy.

A skilled clinician can help you see these variables in your life. By changing just one, the real outcome begins to shift. Add a few more variables into the mix of change, and very quickly, you have a new life that is getting you the results you have long desired. Small changes lead to a significant impact.

292958480Developing deeper empathy…

It’s happened again. You feel alone and like no one understands or sees you. So many times, you have tried to tell them how you are feeling and why these moments impact you, but it’s like a silent scream that no one ever hears. The pain continues to reside with you without help or solutions.

During our sessions, we will work on developing and highlighting the impact and power of empathy in relationships. We can exercise empathy, but some have confusion or difficulty executing this vital attribute. Empathy is one of the most connective things you can have in a relationship. This powerful skill helps you feel seen, heard, and understood. It’s a foundational piece of love expressed.

Resolving conflict effectively…

Conflict is inevitable. It’s going to happen. But when it does, it doesn’t have to destroy. It can be an agent for deep connection if you know what you are doing.

We’ll unpack the situations you keep cycling through conflict in your family and relationships to show you where and how to implement new strategies and ways of communicating that radically transform the conversation and lead to deep understanding and connection.

Managing anger and other emotions…

Ever notice how quickly emotions can escalate, and suddenly you are having a conversation you weren’t expecting? All you wanted to do was communicate something that was off and needed attention. Now it’s uncomfortable, and both frustration and anger are present.

These can be managed by learning to see them for what they are and not getting distracted and off-topic from what matters. We dive into this day one and reveal the secrets to deep communication and connection in almost any situation. Gone are the days of tension and walking on eggshells.

It’s time to get things back on track.

If you’ve seen yourself in the descriptions above, you have also heard how we can help.

We have the answers and solutions you need to repair broken relationships and develop the connection you desire.

You don’t have to stay where you are. Help is just one step away.

Call for your free 15-minute consultation to find out how we can help you: (480) 908-7898.